I know what you are thinking, I do. Let me tell you that you are wrong this time. I am not drinking! Despite a lot of stress and pressure at work. Despite me missing wine a lot and thinking about drinking a lot. For some unknown reason I still believe that wine can take me to the moon and back. Despite this, I am not drinking.
Status: sober. I am sober for two weeks!!!
Mood: so… this one is not easy to describe. I was quite stressed. I was quite pissed. And boy did I feel angry. All of this has not much to do with me not drinking. Well… not drinking contributed a bit. The main reason this time was not booze but my new boss who suddenly turned into a complete ass.
Physical Condition: fine. Finally pulled myself out of this never-ending exhaustion cycle.
Workout: I work out at least 4 times a week! I am adding some light cardio to my lifting routine and I am loving it.
Cravings: I am not going to lie. I am going through a rough time. There are days when I am fine, and then… there are days when I wake up and all I can think is how much I want to drink and how much I am missing wine and how much I am screwed up.
Thoughts about alcohol: see above.
What I am drinking: gallons and barrels of ice tea. And coffee, of course. I am totally over-caffeinated. But sober!
I overindulged on desserts and sugary things of all kinds to the point of being nauseous. Well… THAT needs to stop.
What I am watching: Hart of Dixie Season 3 to take my mind off the booze and have some fun and mindless time. Highly recommended, by the way. The show even makes me laugh sometimes. Out loud. I also watched Marcella Season 1. If you like some great mystery and a serial killer investigation, this one is for you. Netfilx is my best friend nowadays. I also saw Ghostbusters. It was great: funny, smart and very entertaining.
What I am reading: The Fireman by Joe Hill. Not a light read by all means but very engrossing.
What changed in my sober routine: I am starting to get my weekends back: coffee in the morning, reading magazines, relaxing. No headaches. No tiredness. No crankiness. It’s been pretty good. Monday mornings are quite bearable now.
Thought of the day: today is one of my friend’s birthday. I cannot avoid the occasion but I think I should be fine. I truly feel much stronger. Because now I know that even though wine starts off as a way to make my nights more interesting, it eventually becomes a way to make my life duller. I don’t want it anymore.
My goals for the next week: 1. blog more; 2. cut out sugar. seriously… cut out sugar.